The first day of school. My youngest had been nervous, anxious but excited nevertheless. He feared walking in and not knowing anyone. What if no one spoke to him he asked me the night before as we got ready to sleep. Why don’t you speak to them I said. What if no one wants to play with me? You can always ask to join in the game I said. The teacher – will she like me he asked me. I’m sure she would love you I said and hugged him tightly. His questions tugged at my heart. I told him to sleep as we needed to get up early.
I tried to remember my first day at school. I have no memory of how my first day of school was. Maybe we never remember the days we fear the most. We are so worried that we forget to take in memories. I didn’t want him to be scared. I wanted him to make memories.
We got to school early. As we got off from the car he grabbed my hand tightly and walked in. I love holding his tiny hands. He looked at me and smiled. We walked in small steps not really in a hurry to get to the class. Taking our time to get there.
I stood in front of his class as he walked in, he looked confident. He turned and smiled at me. I smiled my biggest smile and gave him a flying kiss. I told him I am standing right outside the class in case you need me.
The teacher gave him an enthusiastic hug and he sat down with the other kids. He didn’t say a word. I stood watching, through the door, my gaze fixed on him. I knew he was sad at leaving his old friends. He missed them much. I had promised him that we would go back for play dates. He believed me. I wanted him to keep his old friends. I wanted him to make new ones.
He sat quietly looking at the kids talking to each other. I was too far away to hear what they said but my guess is that it was all about the wonderfully exciting stuff they had done in the holidays.
The bell rang. It was time for me to leave. He waved at me. I waved back. I turned and slowly walked back to the car. My head full of random thoughts.
Beauty of life is that we can start fresh, we can start all over again and we can start as many times as we like. The lessons learned guide us forever. Friends made stay with us. Nothing is lost I told myself. It’s ok to miss them. It’s ok to make new ones.
This is another beginning – one of the many that I will do in my lifetime. This is the beginning of my new book. One of the many that I will write in this lifetime. The earlier books are closed and shelved. Memories from them are clearly logged in my mind. They are sweet memories. I am not going to be sad.
First page of my new book – getting the kids settled in school. Seems like a beautiful start.